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Contest: Help Us Turn 500 with New Taglines

This is Gnome Stew’s 500th article, and we thought to ourselves, “What better way to ring in 500 than with a contest?”

But first, THANK YOU for reading, commenting, linking, and spreading the word about Gnome Stew. We love writing the Stew, and we’re thrilled at how well the site has been received by GMs all over the world — and how much mileage you get out of our articles and the excellent, thoughtful comments that accompany them. We wouldn’t trade our readership and this community for anything.

We’re hoping you’ll help us celebrate this milestone — a number that still makes me do a double-take every time I see it — with some sexy new taglines. Our taglines appear under “The Game Mastering Blog” in the header — chosen at random whenever a page is loaded or refreshed.

Want to see your taglines atop the Stew — and maybe win something saucy in the process? Read on!

The Prize

Grand prize: There’s one grand prize: a copy of the brand new Alpha Omega creature collection, The Encountered: Volume I [1], courtesy of Mind Storm Labs [2]. Mind Storm sold out of all the copies they brought to GenCon — this is one shiny book.

Alpha Omega is one of my favorite new RPGs. I wrote about how to GM Alpha Omega [3] a little while back, and it’s a damned fine game. Without hyperbole, The Encountered is one of the best monster books I’ve ever read — and I’ve got a couple dozen from various games sitting on my shelf.

My favorite thing about it is that it showcases each critter in context — as part of a scene, in its natural habitat, etc. It’s sumptuously produced, intuitively organized, and just plain beautiful all around. Mind Storm offers a 15 MB preview PDF [4], if you’d like a closer look.

Taglines, HOOOOOOO!: If the idea of seeing your tagline pop up on Gnome Stew is appealing, this contest is for you. We’ll select taglines from ALL entries (not just the winning entry) and incorporate them into the site.

Our basic tagline formula involves 1-3 of the following elements: 1) GMing-related, 2) gnome- or stew-related, 3) funny. The best taglines combine two elements — or all three.

How to Enter

Entering is easy, as always: just comment on this article and write at least one Gnome Stew tagline in your comment.

You’re welcome to include multiple taglines in one comment, and comment as often as you like; only your first comment will be eligible for the random drawing.

Please note that by entering, the tagline or taglines you submit become the property of Gnome Stew. You grant the site full copyright and intellectual property rights to submitted taglines, and just like our current taglines there won’t be any attribution as to who wrote what.

To comment, you’ll need a free Gnome Stew account. Registering is quick and easy. [5]


As we usually do with our contests, we’ll choose the grand prize winner at random. Make sure the email associated with your Stew account is real, since that’s how we’ll contact the winner.

We’ll select taglines to add to the site from ALL comments, not just the winning comment.

The contest ends at 9:00 PM Mountain time on Wednesday, September 30th, 2009, with the grand prize winner announced on the Stew a couple of days later.

Many thanks to Mind Storm Labs [2] for donating our kickass grand prize — and good luck to all you dirty, dirty gnome-lovers out there!

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Comments Disabled To "Contest: Help Us Turn 500 with New Taglines"

#1 Comment By AlasseMages On September 23, 2009 @ 2:45 am

“If it’s got dice, we’ll cover it.”
“It’s like Chicken Soup for the Game Master. Extra beardy.”
“We sit and talk in front of people who sit and talk in front of people.”
“Gnome Stew: Available with Constitution or Charisma.”
(Get it? Get it? It’s a reference to how D&D 3.5 gnomes had +2 Constitution and 4e gnomes have +2 Charisma… And you guys have both… Okay, so not funny.)

#2 Comment By spenser On September 23, 2009 @ 4:57 am

Gnome Stew – It’s what’s for dinner!

#3 Comment By gospog On September 23, 2009 @ 6:09 am

“Hey baby, want to see my lair?”

“There’s no place like gnome.”

#4 Comment By Lumrunner On September 23, 2009 @ 6:43 am

“Gnome Stew – So Meaty!”

“Gnome Stew – More Meat – Less Filler”

#5 Comment By Knight of Roses On September 23, 2009 @ 6:44 am

“Short in stature, tall in content.”

“Your daily meal of useful game advice.”

“Chock full of Game Mastering Advice.”

“Fortified by Reader Comments.”

#6 Comment By Zig On September 23, 2009 @ 7:43 am

Wow! Some really excellent tagline ideas above. Don’t think I can top what’s already come, but here’s my entries anyway =)

“Only organic Gnomes were used in making this site.”

Hmm…Creative block. Guess I’ll just stick with the above and come back later if inspiration gives me a jolt. Can’t wait to see what the other readers come up with!

#7 Comment By Swordgleam On September 23, 2009 @ 7:46 am

“Where are we going and why am I in this cauldron?”

“100% GMing advice, 0% high fructose corn syrup.” (or trans fats, depending on which trend you prefer)

#8 Comment By ThrashLibrarian On September 23, 2009 @ 8:10 am

“Gnome News is Good News”

#9 Comment By Zig On September 23, 2009 @ 8:21 am

Ok, a few more…

“Now FDA approved source of 12 essential vitamins including 100% USRDA vitamin GM.”

“Nine out of ten orcs prefer our brand of Gnome Stew compared to all other competing brands.”

“Choosy Mom’s choose Gnome Stew.”

#10 Comment By pseudodragon On September 23, 2009 @ 8:57 am

I’ll throw in a couple to season the stew:

“Go Gnome or Go Home!”

“Once you’ve had Gnome Stew, you’ll never go back.”

“Over a billion GMs served.”

“Taste the difference gnomes make.”

“It’s good for what ails your game.”

“Choosey GMs choose Gnome Stew.”

“Gnomes don’t make great games. Gnomes make games great.”

“Add flavor to your games with Gnome Stew.”

Good luck to all and thanks for the contest! 🙂

#11 Comment By Xtiangames On September 23, 2009 @ 9:06 am

Gnome Stew – 4d6 inches tall, drop a comment.

Gnome Stew – Because we couldn’t get ‘Mind Flayer Juice’ past our brand manager.

#12 Comment By borfaxer On September 23, 2009 @ 9:10 am

“Better GMing than a stew of gnomes”
“Let stewed gnomes improve your game”
“Better ingredients, better GMing”

#13 Comment By toriel On September 23, 2009 @ 9:51 am

“The best recipes for GMs”
“Gnome parts for GMs brains”
“Stewing ideas (and gnomes) for better GMing”
“The best stew for GMs in the world!”
“Gnome stew might be disgusting but our advice is not”
“Stuff to chew on”

#14 Comment By vooodooo84 On September 23, 2009 @ 10:04 am

Now 100% Dwarf-free

#15 Comment By robinmotion On September 23, 2009 @ 10:08 am

Like everything else, it’s better with cheese

Elves too skinny? Dwarves too fat? Gnomes are juuuuust right.

#16 Comment By Sarlax On September 23, 2009 @ 11:42 am

For all those who felt outcast at not being able to do one single pull-up.

#17 Comment By Tony Graham On September 23, 2009 @ 12:10 pm

Not your garden variety gnomes.

Standing head and shoulders over the Gnomes of Zurich.

Gnome Stew, overflowing with GM goodness.

GM consultants – short in stature, tall in quality.

Gnome Stew – more gaming, less filler.

No gnomes were harmed in the making of this GM stew.

Gnome Stew – taste the adventure!

#18 Comment By BladeMaster0182 On September 23, 2009 @ 12:21 pm

“Tasty Stew, Tastier Advice”

“One Serving Provides 100% of your Daily DM Advice”

“It’s Dark, Cold, and I hear Dice Rolling”

“Ask us about the special ingredient (Hint: Its Gnome)”

“We’re here to serve stew and give advice and we’re all out of stew”

“Guaranteed not to give you cancer”

#19 Comment By robinmotion On September 23, 2009 @ 12:32 pm

Inuendo taglines:

Hot GN on GM action
New risque gnome photos uploaded daily
Live sexy gnome video
Meet sexy local gnomes
Hot barely legal gnomes

And the outlier:
A gnome is a terrible thing to waste

#20 Comment By robinmotion On September 23, 2009 @ 12:35 pm

“I have had it with these motherf$&%ing gnomes on this motherf$&%ing site!”

#21 Comment By Thanatos1442 On September 23, 2009 @ 12:43 pm

Gnome Stew-cause the lil’ ones know all the best secrets.

We’re up to Gnome good.

#22 Comment By Razjah On September 23, 2009 @ 1:40 pm

GM me baby, one more time!

#23 Comment By toriel On September 23, 2009 @ 2:24 pm

Made from all natural ingredients (and gnomes)

#24 Comment By Nomadic On September 23, 2009 @ 3:43 pm

“Clever, but it’s gnomes all the way down.”

“We’d have a tagline here but a gnome stole them all”

“You enter the blog, it is 10ft by 10ft. There is a gnome in the center of the blog. Roll initiative.”

“Part of a completed balanced breakfast (warning: may contain nuts)”

#25 Comment By grieve On September 23, 2009 @ 4:35 pm

From the mouths of gnomes…

#26 Comment By CoarseDragon On September 23, 2009 @ 4:35 pm

“Sniff out good gaming recipes in Gnome Stew.”

#27 Comment By itliaf On September 23, 2009 @ 6:50 pm

Short advice for a for a lifetime of gaming.

#28 Comment By Storyteller On September 23, 2009 @ 6:57 pm

“Red pointy hats not included.”
“Just add holy water.”
“The gnome, the gnome, the gnome is on fire!”

And my favorite:
“Stir until bearded.”

#29 Comment By mln84 On September 23, 2009 @ 8:27 pm

Half tasty crunch, half sweet fluff, all gnome!

#30 Comment By bobg On September 24, 2009 @ 3:34 am

GM Gnome Nom Nom

#31 Comment By Kaldric On September 24, 2009 @ 9:00 am

“Gnome Stew: Heartily endorsed by Kobolds everywhere”

#32 Comment By Wild Joker On September 24, 2009 @ 10:36 am

“Proving daily that size doesn’t matter.”

“It’s not the size of the advice, it’s what you do with it that matters.”

“Is that a pointy hat or are you just happy to see me?”

#33 Comment By DMN On September 24, 2009 @ 3:22 pm

“I like Gnome’s too.”

#34 Comment By DMN On September 24, 2009 @ 3:27 pm

“So many Gnome’s, too little time”

#35 Comment By Timon On September 26, 2009 @ 6:22 am

At the sign of the pointy hat
Gnever gnomic
No transgnomic products used
It is the wisdom of the moderns!
Roll a gnome, get critical

#36 Comment By Alnakar On September 27, 2009 @ 2:15 pm

“Now with extra D6s”
“Gnome-body knows gaming like we do”
“Bearded, for your GMing pleasure”
“Serve over dice for a refreshing snack”
“Save vs Gnomishness or lose your bad GMing habbits”

#37 Comment By Crushnaut On September 29, 2009 @ 7:17 am

Epic Success on your search for GMing advice. Welcome to Gnome Stew.

Experience costs for increasing your GMing skill is halved while on this page.

Thanks for 500 great posts guys!

#38 Comment By philofthefuture On September 29, 2009 @ 10:23 am

Gnome Stew: +5 to GMing

Read Gnome Stew or die

Game mastering just got easier with Gnome Stew

Nom nom nom Gnome Stew

Your players will thank you for eating gnome stew, they won’t for the gas though

With gnome stew there is no reason to fear that dire weasel

Make your games gnomeilicous with gnome stew

Stew, gnomes, game master advice, what else do you need?

It has gnomes in it! It has to be good!

#39 Comment By robinmotion On September 29, 2009 @ 10:25 am

Gnambo! It’s got electrolytes!

#40 Comment By Martin Ralya On September 30, 2009 @ 9:05 pm

This contest is now over — our thanks to everyone who entered! We’ve got some killer taglines to mull over.

We’ll announce the lucky winner in the next couple of days. 🙂