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Your Shiny Wazoo at Con On The Cob & Johnny’s Five With Andy Hopp

COTCLOGO [1]  To those of you who do the convention circuit, you’ve probably heard about this thing called Con on The Cob [2] – Games, Art, Freaks & Fun. It’s a small-ish convention in northern Ohio from October 15th –17th. It generates a lot of buzz for a very good reason. I went to last year’s Con On the Cob with my gaming company and had a blast. I have some stories that I can’t really tell, and I have some stories that I can tell. I met a lot of great people and had a great time.

What exactly does con on the cob offer?

So, Con On the Cob, definitely a great time. If you are looking for one more convention to make it to this year, or you haven’t been able to make it to any, I would definitely suggest Con On The Cob in mid-october, but I got in touch with Andy Hopp and asked him a couple of questions about it.

Johnny’s Five – Five Question Interview With Andy Hopp
For those not familiar with Andy’s style, get ready for a wild ride. I’ve left Andy’s answers EXACTLY as he gave them.

Hey Andy, thanks for answering a few questions. First off, when and why did you start Con On the Cob?

Way back in the day. I mean waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay way back in the day. Seriously, like 2003 or something, I met a certain aspiring artist at Gen Con. For the sake of anonymity, let’s called him Jim Y. No, wait, that’s too obvious, let’s call him J. Yoder instead. Anyway, this mysterious fellow showed me his sketchbook, which was filled with all manner of fantastically twisted scribblings and creatively stylized drawings. They were very imaginative, but I could see he would benefit from a bit of tutelage in the basics -stuff like perspective, creating depth and shadows and the like. You know, basic artsy-fartsy stuff.

Anyway, I said to myself, “Hey, why not invite some of my artist friends and aspiring-artist friends over to my house for a weekend so we can draw stuff together and maybe play some games and stuff?” “No reason,” I replied. “Cool, let’s do it.” Wow, I just noticed, due to a barely caught typo, how “aspirin” and “aspiring” are only one letter away from each other. Some poet or something should notice that and do something about it.

So that’s what we did. I expected maybe ten people to show up but almost thirty arrived. Friends came from all over the country. We went to the Cleveland zoo and drew animals. We had some art workshops. I made waffles. We played a Call of Cthulhu game with a nightclub called “The Swinging Cock” (it’s sign had a rooster on a trapeze) and much fun was had. I woke everyone up in the morning with a song…* [6]
The waffles had blueberries. I think. My memory’s a bit fuzzy on that detail.

Fast forward, if you will, to the futuristic year of 2005. Flying cars and personal jet packs were all the rage. Soylent Green filled every lunch box and our alien overlords only ate the slow ones. The prevailing philosphy of the day suggested we have another event like the one we had in 2003 (we skipped 2004 because my daughter was busy being born). We were like, hey, if it was that much fun and it was just sort of an informal gathering of chums how much fun would it be if we actually invited people? So we did. This time we had it at a hotel instead of my basement. Sean Fannon almost got arrested. The hotel staff were dangerously unaware we were coming even though I set it up months in advance. We only had one little room and a breakfast area. Everything that could go wrong went wrong, but it was still the most fun ever.

We did it again the next year, in a larger but even shittier hotel with an even more incompetent staff (with a single tooth among them). We added some music shows with Worm Quartet and Sudden Death, a vendor’s room, more art programming, and expanded gaming. We had parties and Klingons and the Corny Awards and broken glass in the carpet and no running water and no toilet paper and trash everywhere and Jeff Easley and Shane Hensley and Bill the Lizard and gaming out the wazoo and I lost my voice by the end of it and it was the most fun ever.

The next year we moved to another hotel. One with an actual semi-competent staff and lots more room. We had Larry Elmore and a bigger vendor’s room and a bigger art show and more gaming and more music and more parties and cops and hot dogs and Extreme Twister and miniatures and my parents and it was the most fun ever.

The last year we moved to another hotel. This one was bigger and cleaner and we had even more gaming and music and parties and art and guests and all the crap I’ve been talking about. It was awesome and you were there and so were you and it was the most fun ever.

Now it’s now and it’s going to be the most fun ever.

Con On The Cob has a great amount of diversity to its offerings. What are your favorite parts of it, and do you have any plans to add or improve any areas in the next iterations?

Absolutely everything is my favorite part but my real favorite part is just meeting people and making new friends and swimming in my money pool like Scrooge McDuck. For me Con on the Cob, or Con on the Mu’Fu’in’ Cob as it’s known in some necks of the woods, is like a big whirlwind of fun. I’m constantly pulled in sixteen different directions like some sort of Stretch Armstrong being drawn and quartered (drawn and sixteenthed?) by a horde of awesome people. Or maybe Stretch Monster, he was cooler. I make it my personal mission to individually meet every single person who comes through the door.

As for specifics, I always enjoy the music shows, and the gaming, and the parties. Oh, and especially the art show and the vendors room. And the Children of the Cob events. And also, I especially really like the miniatures painting and all the demos and seminars and stuff. I love that it’s all about everyone. Kids, adults, old people, middle-aged people, teenagers, embryos, tweens, etc… There’s always something for anybody to do. If you’re not having fun you must be dead.

Of course we’re always trying to make sure there’s new stuff to do, games to play, and  interesting guests to meet. New on this year’s rooster is Life-sized Tsuro, a buttload of Living Forgotten Realms games, I know I said rooster instead of roster but I like it better that way, a whole room dedicated to miniatures, karaoke, more vendors, more artists, three rounds of Iron Artist, new parties, trick or treating, a zombie walk, LARPs, an extended LAN party, Rock Band and Mario Cart, and so much more I’m making myself nauseous just thinking about it.

The trick is not to over think things. Just do what’s fun and see what happens. We’ve scrapped some old events that didn’t appeal to people too much, like the anime room and the cannibalistic blood orgy, and we’ve added all that stuff I just went on about. Trust me, it’ll be the most fun ever. If it’s not you can punch me in the stomach.

A phrase that is bandied about in conjunction with Con On the Cob is Shiny Wazoo, can you guarantee me a shiny wazoo?

Absolutely! Official Con on the Cob Wazoo Polish can be purchased in the gift shop.

Con On The Cob has a sister convention that you also run called Oddmall. What is that all about? What’s different in Oddmall from Con On the Cob?

Actually Con on the Cob’s sister and BFF con is AnCon, which is run by Dave Radzik and the gang. It’s uber-fun and you should go to it. www.anothergamecon.com [7].

Oddmall is an arts and crafts show I run in May and November at the same hotel as Con on the Cob. It’s all about strange and unusual art and crafts and you really should scurry your unpolished wazoo over there as well. www.oddmall.info [8].

Every article we write has to have a Game Mastering bent to it. So tell me this, what does Con On The Cob have to offer to to the Game Master in particular?

More than anything else CotC offers Game Masters (and everybody else) the chance to interact with game creators, industry professionals, artists, and other like-minded sorts in a casual and non-intimidating environment. We actually want to hear about your adventures.


* Andy’s Wake Your Ass Up Song

Way up in the sky the little birds fly
While down in their nest the little birds rest
With a wing on their left and a wing on their right
The little birds sleep all throoooough the night.
The bright sun comes up, the dew falls away
“Good morning, good morning,” the little birds say.

4 Comments (Open | Close)

4 Comments To "Your Shiny Wazoo at Con On The Cob & Johnny’s Five With Andy Hopp"

#1 Comment By The Bearded Goose On September 15, 2009 @ 11:26 pm

I’ve been on staff for the Con for the last two years, and I have to tell you, this is exactly Andy. He’s odd, he’s fun, and you won’t be the same after meeting him, I promise you.

I hope to see everyone at the Cob. Look for me in the Mother of All Marketplaces or the gaming rooms.

#2 Comment By Kurt “Telas” Schneider On September 16, 2009 @ 11:36 am

Damn. I’m already at negative SpouseKarma, but I really really really want to go…

#3 Comment By John Arcadian On September 16, 2009 @ 2:02 pm

Kurt, it is an awesome time. Start working up that spousal karma now! You may have to go to extremes and go to the . . . icecapades or see an opera!!!! Whatever it takes, it is worth it.

#4 Comment By Kurt “Telas” Schneider On September 21, 2009 @ 7:49 pm

Dude, my mom used to sing us that song… Seriously.